“One’s real life is often the life that one does not lead.”~ Oscar Wilde

During the first 3 years of life,a child’s right brain is dominant allowing for a more natural adjustment to their new world. However,after the age of 3,the left brain along with its thought process begins to assert its dominance…this brings about the formation of our socially conditioned self…it occurs through an imprinting process embedding a social self within the memory of the brain…during this stage we develop the socially conditioned self which we consider to be our true identity and meaning in life. It includes a self image,role playing,social beliefs and goals all of which make up our conditioned self with its assumption of being able to control itself… This process takes on a significant influence for the balance of our life.

The development of our social self happens largely through our subconscious mind originating especially through family relations…when a child is brought up in an impoverished and dysfunctional family,the imprinted social self usually reflects many of these characteristics…however the left brain with it many “shoulds” and expectations also assumes it has self control and can bring about necessary changes in the social self…unfortunately this often leads to a stressful feeling of being trapped in hopelessness and depression…and when the ego demands become dictatorial it can create fertile grounds for an emotional problems.

We do need to experience a deep discontent with our illusory social self before we are willing to “let go” and surrender out of it…and the act of surrender opens the door to a profound awareness of our right brain and its occupant our natural self.Every attempt to open the door by our self is just another trick of the left brain ego and destined to fail. It is a gift given only to those who can accept the helplessness of their ego.

“Adversity is like a strong wind. It tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that we see ourselves as we really are. ~Arthur Golden

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